New Year New Blog

January 3rd, 2010 by LB, under Yackadactyl. No Comments

Hello all,  which at this point might be no one   I’ve missed blogging immensely, and so have decided to start again, but with a more focused approach.  I’m going to dedicate my blogging energy to exclusively health and fitness endeavors and you can find me at www.loewenbehold.ca/uptownsmalltown, and you’ll note the category names are familiar – there are a few posts here that I’d like to ressurect as well.

I haven’t decided quite what I will do with this blog, and I may move the new one to a different domain, but in the meantime, there I am.  I plan to post about three times per week if you are so inclined.  You can quite easily subscribe to the RSS feed on the website which will automatically update you on current posts, or I have set up a profile on twitter – I am Loewenbehold.

I’ve missed you all and look forward to connecting on the new site.  As always comments and requests are welcome. 

Happy New Year!

New Tricks?

July 20th, 2009 by LB, under Incessant Obsession, Yackadactyl. No Comments

I often wonder how much of who we are comes to this world and how much we really can choose or change.   I come from what seems to a long line of over achievers and if you had asked me a couple of years ago I would have told you it was one of our strengths.  It can be a great, but like many good things it can also be a curse.

I was recently accepted into a Doctoral Program that starts in September.   In my achievement oriented mind this is a great thing and certainly not something to change one’s mind about, but yet in a year ram jam packed full of change I find myself really wondering if this is such a good idea.

Truth is, it probably isn’t, but how do I shut up that nagging voice.  You know the one on your shoulder reminding you how wimpy it is to quit, telling you strong women don’t stop what they set out to do.  If you are still asking yourself which voice – that would be the one.   I’m trying to trust my gut instinct on this one, but its hard to hear with all the racquet going on in my head.

Endless Summer

July 20th, 2009 by LB, under A Slice of Heaven. No Comments

As I sit here, sipping on my chai tea listening to Shark trying to get going upstairs (an event that always requires some coaching) and watching the morning sun on the trees, I am musing about living somewhere where summer is more than ‘the day last month that I went swimming.  Shark and I have been spending tons of time in the lake.  See, that’s the very best part.  You can actually get in the water…. and stay in.  For quite some time even.

I feel so, so lucky to be living here.

Black Holes

July 19th, 2009 by LB, under Shark Tales. No Comments

Shark spent last week at the Centre of the Universe in Astronomy Camp, and while I am much relieved that it seems I won’t need a new vehicle, the idea of being sucked into the black hole that is at the centre of the Milky Way is a little terrifying; the only comfort is learning from my budding astronomer that the sun is a young star and will grow thereby frying us before that happens anyway.

Apparently this is all several million years into the future, but still something about the fact the earth, or the present perfect conditions for life, are not  forever no matter what we do, or don’t do, has shaken me up a bit.  No worries though, Shark seems fine.

Thank God next week is Girls Just Wanna Have Fun Camp.  I don’t think I am up for another week of dinner conversation about the end of the World.

The Machine

January 5th, 2009 by LB, under Yackadactyl. 7 Comments

Somewhere back in primary school I read a science fiction short story by Issac Asimov called The Machine.  In it, the human race had lost mobility as a result of evolutionary adaptations to automation.   It all seemed so bizarre back then, but the story came flooding back this summer when Shark and my nieces and nephews went to see Wall E, only this time it didn’t just seem plausible, but rather inevitable.

Well today, I went to Wallmart where I honestly try never to go, and was so disturbed I still have not recovered. The store was so big you could play football in there, but yet there was only one cashier on.  This must have been to encourage patrons to take advantage of the self serve check outs.  Yep, you can scan and pay for your own products.  (Ask me about the implications of Wallmarts computerized inventory – its worthy of another post)  The automated voice must be several decibels above limits safe to human ears, and so when more than one are going, its truly impossible to think.  And God knows at my age I don’t need anything interfering with that.

But that’s not the most disturbing part.  It was the Sea of Wall Mart employees congregating in the the open area for a morning pep rally.  There were two people in suits delivering the mornings message and staffing details to over thirty employees.   Those dressed in blue would periodically clap and cheer.  They even said Good Morning in concert when prompted.  And, when I walked by with the Swiffer, which I couldn’t find in anyother store, in hand, one of then men in suits smiled at me, but I swear it looked like his face would crack.  I was sure I was in big space ship in the Wall E movie.

The piece de la resistance though was when I went to ask for help because I couldn’t find the Swiffers in the football field, the fellow I asked said, “Sorry, I work at Macdonalds.  I’m shopping to,”  Then I noticed it was an M and not a W on his blue vest.  Such a subtle difference, especially when you’re dsylexic.  Oh yeah, and I bought a biodegradable garbage can, but then it hit me, exactly when does it start to biodegrade?

Is this all the hick in me acclimatizing, or is this beyond bizarre?

‘Tis the Season

December 22nd, 2008 by LB, under Yackadactyl. 5 Comments

I know I am supposed to focus on all the blessings in my life, and there are many, but often Christmas leaves me aware of what’s missing.  This year I hoped to preempt that feeling by focusing on helping people who have less, but that’s just it… they have less and me helping out a little here or there doesn’t really change that.

And so in a conversation today with a really good friend I remembered my very favourite Christmas….

I had run away to live in San Diego with my daughter and in doing that had left my husband, although I didn’t declare it publically.  My brothers, one of whom was in the middle of a divorce, decided Southern California was a great place to spent the festive season and so they piled into the Saturn wagon to drive South.   Meanwhile my soon to be former husband had boarded a train and was headed the same way.

We all convened in Shark’s and my teeny apartment with a couple pieces of loaned furniture and pretty much melted down.  It was such a disaster than on the morning of Christmas Eve we took the Turkey and all the fixings to the food bank and hit the road… all of us…. in a caravan.

We ate Christmas Eve dinner at the Pizza Hut and checked into the Motel 6 on the side of the road near the Joshua Tree Park.  We had a little pine cone for a Christmas Tree and were able to see the sun rise over the desert on Christmas morning. Other than Shark, I don’t think there were any gifts exchanged, or at least that I remember.  We spent Christmas Day on the road and ate dinner in a restaurant on the rim of the Grand Canyon, watching the sunset.

There was no tree, no cookies, no stockings, no eggnog and no fuss…. just the five of us, none of whom could have been described as jolly, together in the middle of the high California desert.   That’s the Christmas I love most.

Shark’s Kernels of Wisdom

November 28th, 2008 by LB, under Shark Tales. 3 Comments

Tonight at dinner she announces:

The past is history.

The future’s a mystery.

Now is a gift.

That’s why they call it a present.

Hard to Leave

November 10th, 2008 by LB, under Tlell Me About It. No Comments

When I said it was hard to leave,  I forgot how hard it really is to leave in November…..  Empty house, car packed and ready to go and wind howling outside so loud I’m sure there’s no way the ferry will make it over tonight, and wouldn’t you know it this storm is rapidly followed by another one.  As much as I’d like to get this show on the road, I hate it when they make a run for it between systems….

Ugh. 

Making Memories

November 6th, 2008 by LB, under Yackadactyl. 1 Comment

Does it happen to you that you become acutely aware that you are in a moment that you will carry with you for always?  Does time then seem to slow to a soothingly slow pace allowing you to soak up and savour this time in every way,  so that the memory is vivid and full?

So, the last couple of weeks have been for me….. its hard to leave all…..

The Best Laid Plans

November 3rd, 2008 by LB, under Yackadactyl. 1 Comment

I used to think that plans and lists were the cornerstones of a well lived life.  I have since changed my mind.  I guess because by the time you reach my age you realize that nothing stays the same, nothing is predictable and things often aren’t what they seem.

Everything seemed so well laid out.  I’d finish work on Friday and have ten days to finish packing up the house while Shark was at school.  I’ve worked at this every weekend for two months, so I felt confident there was not so much left to do and lots of time.  I envisioned myself having some last walks on the beach, enjoying some last sunsets from my beautiful house and having some great last visits with friends and family.

I didn’t plan on getting sick.  Really sick, like pretty much the sickest I have ever been.  And so I couldn’t really finish work because I couldn’t really get there, and the view was a mute point because I’ve been laying around hacking up a lung with my eyes closed, which apparently was another mute point because you can’t see the mountains anyway because its so overcast.  Well, that’s fine, I’m thinking I’ve still got lots of time.

But, I certainly didn’t plan for Shark to get sick.

Sometimes you just have to completely let go, surrender and realize things are what they are and do the very best you can, and accept the help of those who offer.   Thanks to so many family and friends who have gone above and beyond the call of duty this last week, and who are continuing to offer to do so.

I have to say you guys……. you are making it very hard to leave (nevermind the fact I still can’t contemplate moving furniture)….. I just keep reminding myself its only geography.

And this year,  my day…… you know the one I need like I need a hole in the head, is postponed.  Yep, see most years it falls on Nov 4th.  Well, this year my daughter wants to bake a cake with her Granny and she can’t do that because she’s too sick, so we’ll pick another day when she feels up to it, and that will be the day.  I’m not exactly sure when that will be yet, but that’s as it should be.